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Jan 4 '14

Anonymous asked:

HI! 1/31/2013 the girl who said conor raped her wrote this on the bright eyes facebook page~" The last time I saw Desaparecidos perform at the Cat's Cradle, it was my 16th birthday and Conor pulled me up on stage and sang happy birthday. Best memory ever" so are you sure she isnt a liar before saying all of this??

i’m going to address this only after talking to her and asking if she would mind me posting a portion of our private conversation last night. now that she said it would be ok i’m going to address this.

last night i sent her this screen cap when i found it (unedited version) 

image

her: Yeah? That happened. Beforehand, obviously.
me: people are going to be looking at everything to try and disprove you.. it just looks strange for you to say it was the best memory ever on the same night
her: a year ago I didn’t have any intention of telling anyone what happened. I never did really. It just happened. I have friends that went to school with me, are fans and I am not going to lie that was a very good time in my life and his music is related to all of those memories because I was getting freedom for the first time, going out with friends mostly to shows, etc. Maybe it is not normal but I do sometimes still struggle with being a fan and what happened. I know it is strange and looks strange and people are going to question me and that’s fine. I would, too. especially his fans. It’s understandable. My parents are both extremely abusive and even as an adult I still seek their approval struggle with the good times vs what they did to me and it may seem different but in a lot of ways it’s not in my mind. I have issues I am aware of that.
I really don’t expect anyone to coddle me or hate him or even believe me. I didn’t intend for the world to find out either however stupid that might sound because I posted it online. But I didn’t expect it to leave the comment section of xojane.
me:i respect that. i can understand how hard it is to separate. i wanted to bring it to your attention and hear what you had to say about it
her: In a lot of ways that was a really good night. I was this 16 yr old nobody. I really looked up to the older crowd that frequented the indie scene in chapel hill. and that night since I was brought up on stage I was the coolest kid there, everyone wanted to talk to me because I “knew” Conor. sometimes that overshadows what happened later and I suppose that says something about my self esteem. Sometimes I feel stupid to feel that I was raped because so many think they would love to be in that situation.
and just now
me: are you sure you’re ok with me posting it?
her:  I would like to reply to the comments I made a year ago specifically and that I do struggle internally with being a fan and what happened.
me: no problem. like i said i didnt want to just do it and have you upset with me at all i want to respect your privacy as much as possible
her: I appreciate that but that is the one thing I want to address because people are shitting themselves if they think they can be so in love with someone’s music and follow him for years and basically be obsessed, his biggest fan, etc etc and then just cut all that off because he turned out to be a dick. Especially the way he turned out to be a dick because all I heard my friends saying and the fan girls online was that they’d looove for Conor to “rape” them (rape was thrown around a lot more back before like 2010). so yeah you do have mixed feelings, you do get confused, you do struggle internally with what you imagined him and idolized him to be compared to what he did and try to make sense of how can he be the same person with both ends or can he? and so on. If they think they know they would be or feel any different, I call bullshit because you do not know anything until it happens to you. I don’t care if people doubt me or say horrible things about me, I knew they would just because they love him so much. But those comments are a bullshit reason to tbh. I would rather it be blind hate than them claiming to be straddling the fence and then see those comments and be like “yep well that made my mind up for sure then” lol just silly to me.

13 notes Tags: tw rape

  1. cryism reblogged this from connyxoberst
  2. my-land-locked-blues said: If I’m being honest I’m still very incredulous
  3. connyxoberst posted this